Thursday, September 16, 2010

things I shouldn't do

Last weekend, at the urging of a friend, I went to see an astrologer. Something I've never really wanted to waste my $$ on before, but, well, she was insistent.

She of course, as I'd never done this before and was terrified, made me go first.

Sigh.

Name (only first) birthdate, birth time & where was I born.

And then away he went.

The things he shouldn't know:

- that I was married but have been separated a long time
- my father has a blood related problem
- I have 2 siblings
- I've had 2 miscarriages - but have no children (one was a girl he said, that made me cry later when I was alone, as much as I've never really wanted kids)

The good things he said:

- I'm a generally lucky person with a generally easy going chart
- that I'll be divorced from this first husband by my next birthday (that's March peeps!)
- that I'll get married a second time and that will be it (I really have no desire to marry again, but I guess it means someone might love me?)

The big things:

- one of the very first things to pop out of his mouth was "your 42nd year will bring huge changes to your life" (he had to ask me when I am 42, he hadn't calculated that)
- there will be much travelling, overseas
- I am a suspicious person. Very. And I weigh that suspicion against the truth, and frequently screw things up because I go with suspicion (oh yes, this I do).
- there is a man. And in line with the above suspicion, I am not sure whether to believe what he tells me or not, because there's a situation I don't like, he's married or has a woman in some way or another. But I love him. And that when all is said and done, he & I will be fine together, everything will work out, we will get married & I may have a late child because he wants it.

There were a few other things also, but, to the great disappointment of my friend, there's really nothing overly bad about my chart (unlike hers, which is a mess, so at least she felt she got something from it).

Of course, I'm a very suspicious person. Do I believe any of this malarky? I know people (actually my friend that convinced me to go) that have had things happen as predicted by some of these people....

So I'm taking it all with a grain of salt. Obviously the big changes are my move overseas. The man is obviously the Brit (I won't lie, I do love the asshole). But, as probably only one of my readers knows, the issues are possibly more complicated then this astrologer has any clue, and may not be forgiveable, or may not be something I want to be involved with.

So really...yeah....I shouldn't have done this, because I have a million questions in my mind, a million things have rushed back to my mind where I had gotten rid of them concerning the Brit. I don't want to love him. I don't want to marry him, I don't want to forgive him for what he's lied to me about.

2 comments:

Adventures In China said...

I've never been to an astrologist, but I guess I view them as harmless fun. If it makes you feel better about your circumstances, why not let someone give you some hope?

tonyadesigns said...

I've always been curious about seeing a psychic/astrologer type person. And I know this isn't the popular thing to say to you right now, but I still don't understand the relationship fully. It just doesn't seem that love should be so hard to work on/figure out. He isn't the last man on earth, and I sometimes think you don't love yourself enough to let go and find someone who IS capable of just loving you without so many complications. You just seem worth it to me.