Thursday, December 31, 2009

may this be a better year

Looking back over it, I didn't really have the happiest of years.

Started in January

Last New Years, where I found our Jam Flirt had a girlfriend, heartbreak to start the year. Have I mentioned that they are pregnant? It's a miracle baby, and they're happy, so I'm not about to fault them for it at all. Maybe Jam Flirt will become a responsible human from this.

Then I fell and badly damaged my knee, which hasn't recovered completely since. Oh the pain on my way over here last week.

First cold of so damned many last year. Seriously sick of being sick.

The cold in the hell hole we call Montreal. Last winter was wicked. And then the horrible heat & humidity during the summer. Absolute hell.

My friend M's apartment building burned down.

Money & work stress. And lots of it.

The end of a long term friendship, a bad, horrible end, not caused by me, caused by her and her new boyfriend, who had been dating another friend when they got together. May karma kick them both in the arse.

My colleague's stroke at the young age of 52. She'll never return to work, and because she tried to do too much, she broke her hip a month ago. I feel terrible for her.

Much trouble from my family because I want to move to the UK.

Got the H1N1 virus and thought I was going to die.

Found out I can't work for my company in the UK, they already hired someone back in July and didn't bother telling me.

My grandmother is dying of cancer. Very sudden to us, considering that she's probably had it for years and the no good doctor in Ontario never looked into it.

My bathroom flooded my kitchen, and the insurance company refuses to pay.

Problems with my middle sister.

Many hamster deaths over the past year. And one mouse. And my cat that dropped dead the day I left for England in September.

Dog-walker hell pre London trip #2.

There were good things too.

Like jam nights. Oh we had a hell of a lot of fun.

I attended Technodoll's wedding, where I met her and Vegas and Prin!

Got my first singing gig in years (3 last year actually).

I saved my friend M's hamster from the fire in her apartment.

Met my Molly and adopted her. Same for my Tao. Now they're a bunny-loving couple.

Much photography, and a few break thrus in terms of famous-ness of my subjects.

Helped in 2 seizures for the SPCA.

The Brit and I hooked up after 15 years.

Decided to live my lifelong dream, and move to the UK.

Did alot of volunteering (breast cancer walk and my tenure at the SPCA)

Flew over to the UK. And had a wonderful time.

Came back, and had a free apartment to boot.

I try so hard to be positive. I really do. And it's just not working for me at all...I don't get it.

I have to just try to believe that the next year will be better. It *has* to be better, doesn't it?

They say that the way you end the year is the same way you'll end the next year. Does that mean I'm stuck in a rut forever, alone on New Years? Always and forever?

God I hope not.

Here's to 2010 being better. Please?

Tuesday, December 29, 2009


I never want to leave here.


Sunday, December 27, 2009

my temporary abode

Just a few pics to illustrate my cute little temporary abode. It's the top of an old house, condo that my friend & fiance rent. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms. Cutest little kitchen ever, a million times better than mine and a 1/4 of the size!

This is the view from the window in the living/dining room into the backyard, you can see the other houses around. The one thing that this illustrates, and that really makes me like the UK more and more, is that this is downtown, West end but downtown London all the same, and look at all the green and trees. You don't find that at home, in Montreal we have a "paved paradise and put up a parking lot" situation happening. And it really pisses me off. They seem to find the balance here. Beautiful window eh?

It's very bright in here during the day, they have skylights that face the street, but all you see is the tile roof, and's quite lovely.

This is the little galley kitchen, and I love it. I do not, however, love the little fridge freezer. I have enough food in it for me, 2 bottles wine and a bottle of cider, but that's it. Nothing like my 17 cubic foot fridge freezer at home, whcih is considered small.

And this is me trying to get a shot of the ceiling in the livingroom/dining room area, because it's all angled due to the dormer windows and the roof and everything. Please ignore my mess....

And this is the bedroom I'm staying in. My friends don't have alot of stuff, most of this is from the owner of the condo, very common to get furnished rental units here. Again, ignore my disaster....I'm a messy person and I hadn't neatened from last night...yeah...

So there you have it, I haven't taken a photo of outside, I'm not sure the other tenants would appreciate it!

My little temporary home away from home!

Saturday, December 26, 2009

I'm hhheeeeerrreee!

So I got here first try. Flew economy class, stuffed like a sardine into a center seat (I hate not being able to see out of the plane, hate it, I need to see wing or an engine or something....and when I land ... well let's just say I was driving my fellow passenger crazy craning to see what was sitting on the ground at the airport. I'm insane.

But, to quote the guy from Air Canada who gave me my seat, it's all about getting a seat on that flight, the Paris flight was way overbooked and they were offering to move people via London, and I was worried I wouldn't get on at all, but voila, a seat was there for me!

So I arrived in the dark. It is dark late here, til almost 8 am - gets dark at about 3 pm, bit more than at home. Waited FOREVER to get thru customs (about 45 minutes), I fondly remember the days when Canada was in the line indicated "UK & Commonwealth countries" and I used to laugh at the Americans. Now, I'm in the line with them and just about anyone else that isn't from business class or the European Community. Sigh.

Get down to the Heathrow trains and find out the one I need is NOT running, apparently just about nothing is running, including tubes and busses...would have cost me £18 to Paddington and then about £50 to the flat from there, so I opted for £50 from Heathrow to the flat. Damn. And that's with no traffic.

There's no snow on the ground here, not a stitch, it had been raining a bit, I was tired, and cranky (no sleep on the flight, my knees ached the entire time and I was uncomfy), and weak...due to no breakfast (a muffin and a coffee does not breakfast make, but I fly cheap and dinner was good so let's not complain too much right?)and exhaustion from dragging my bags around for 1/2 an hour into the bus station and then back again (bus & tube are below another terminal....there are 5 at Heathrow). 6 flights of stairs, trying not to cry, I got into the flat.

The flat is very sweet, I'll take a few photos tomorrow, it's dark now (it is almost midnight), and in my opinion rather large for a west London flat (2 bedrooms and decent sized ones).

The heating situation. My friend warned me I wouldn't be able to figure it out. And I can't. I have absolutely no idea what in hell. I know how to turn it on, but I have no clue how to keep it on. It's gas, it also heats the hot water, which is upon demand. Also very bizarre for me! I'm used to just turning the damned thing on and having hot water from the 60 gallon tank downstairs in my basement!

So, I think I've gotten used to freezing. I guess it's the damp, because I'm wearing an open fall jacket outside (sweater underneath yes), but need a sweater and a blankie in here. I'll ask the Brit to take a look and explain when he gets here.

There are 2 bathrooms in this 2 bedroom flat. Well, one water closet (toilet & sink only), and one full bathroom, also with a toilet. I find that very bizarre, although I do understand the concept, and my friend says it's useful when her fiance goes for a "constitutional". Aka she doesn't have to wait forever, nor die of the residual fumes!

Grocery shopping. I had bacon for dinner Xmas day. And yogurt and papadum crisps. It's all I could get. But that's ok! The stove is in celcius...bizarre, had to Google it....

The place I wanted to shop, Iceland, was closed today, it's the cheapest joint, so I had to shop at 3 different places. I had to go back for eggs. That would be because I couldn't find any. Why? They are on the shelf beside the cereal, not in the refrigerated section. How bizarre. Had noticed that my friend had hers out on the counter here (but they are past date - each eggy stamped with a best before date), and I had to actually ask at Sainsbury where the hell they were, and the guy looked at me like I was nuts looking in the fridge section.


Electricity. I went to put the recycling downstairs, and it was past dark. You have to turn the hallways lights on. They don't stay on all the time here, only long enough for me to get from the 3rd floor down to the main floor, then I had to turn them back on to get back up. Well, or kill myself.

So, on that note, I am tucked in on the sofa, and think another cup of tea is in order. My friend has the best kettle, ready in under 5 mins. If I wouldn't have to buy it a plug for Canada, I'd bring one home!

And that is it for now!

Watching "Law & Order SVU" - cuz it's only American on the tube tonight!

Wednesday, December 23, 2009


My dog walker backed out on me at the last minute.

What in hell am I going to do now?

Hopefully my kind neighbour will do this for me, if I pay her. And her daughter.


listening to: "The Boxer" Simon & Garfunkle

Tuesday, December 22, 2009


This is a flyby screaming.....

I am still the only standby listed for the flight. Shhhhhhhhh or all the others from Friday and Saturday might find out.

Keep all your appendages crossed for me that I get on .

I need this more than I can tell anyone.

Monday, December 21, 2009

panic-stricken in Montreal

So. I panic I won't get on my flight.

I panic the house isn't clean.

I panic I haven't done everything I need to for the animals.

I panic.

Welcome to the "pre-London trip" panic-fest!

And PS. They got f-ing snow in London. A whole centimeter. And they're now panic-stricken.

Time to feed the mouse, he's talking to me.....Henri tells me when he's run out of food with little mousey chirps.

I am losing it aren't I?

Listening to: "It Snowed" - Meaghan Smith

Thursday, December 17, 2009


British Airways got a court injunction, there will be no strike during the holiday season.


Listening to: "Too Many Dicks on the Dance Floor" - Flight of the Conchords

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

there's always got to be a wrench, man....

So because we wouldn't want anything to go well for myself, new twist in the tale of a trip to London over the holidays is the British Airways flight attendants deciding that the holidays was an EXCELLENT time to go on stike.

How does this affect me you ask?

I'm flying standby with Air Canada. The only other airline leaving Montreal for London. And now my flights both in and out are full.

I'd leave on the 24th, except that I don't think my friend's neighbors want me knocking on their door on Christmas day. At 8-9 am because the flight is always early from Montreal. Tail winds.


Keep your fingers crossed they legislate them to stay working.

And not just for me, they're idiots. They're all almost out of jobs. They do this to BA, and they can kiss the airline right into bankruptcy that it won't be able to get out of.


Listening to: "Electric Twist" - A Fine Frenzy
"Never Look Back" - Blue Rodeo

Monday, December 14, 2009


Yeah. I need to learn to do that a bit better. I am OH SO good at it at work. But so OH NOT good at it in my interpersonal relationships.

So, friend of mine had asked about the status of the situation with the Brit, I relayed the whole thing to her and she said to me "are you sure he understands where you stand on this issue, were you perfectly clear? Men can't read minds, women can, but men can't".

Ummmmm yeah so I was thinkin' to myself "was I?".

So I texted, clarifying the situation and got back a message ... well "what? what? it's about work, I had a surprise for you, I don't want to ruin it, I want to see you, what??????"

Um yeah. So little Miss Communication here....sigh.

So. I'll apparently have more company then I thought I would. Um.

Egg on face anyone?

Sigh, at 40 I would have figured I would have now?

Listening to: "Wheat Kings" The Tragically Hip

Friday, December 11, 2009

done I guess?

So, he never answered me. Never told me. But managed to answer a joke I sent to a bunch of male friends, in which he was included, with "now THIS email I like".

So I don't want to see him.

The Brit smiles at me and I melt, I can't see him, I'll just let him pull this shit again.

I know men ignore what they don't want to deal with, but I just can't stand it. I'm across the ocean, don't leave me hanging.

So effectively, at this moment, one trip ruined by him. Seeing him was part of what I was looking forward to.

But that's ok, I'll be fine without.

Listening to: Royal Wood - Juliet

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

is it wrong?

Is it wrong to just want a frigging drama-free life?

I got rid of a few people that were making my life a living hell, figured once they were off and gone, things would be a hell of a lot more smooth sailing.

But apparently not. Apparently I'm meant to live in hell.

Insurance company comes back to me with a ridiculous offer, less than 1/3 of what the estimate I got on the kitchen would cost. I tell my broker "forget it, they'll hear from the lawyer", and the insurance comes back asking for a copy of the estimate so they can look into it again.

Sigh. Can this not be a shitload more simple?

Good news is I now have 2 offers on the table to buy my house. So when I know what in hell I'm doing, I'll be able to sell it.

And then there's men. I won't bore you, except to say that The Brit told me he has something to explain to me when we see each other ("but it's not bad!"), I want him to tell me now so I don't have to wonder about it for 3 weeks. Frankly, I'll be the judge of what's "not bad!". He hasn't given me any idea yet.


So he's been told unless he explains, we won't be seeing each other.

Can I go away now? I would really love that.

Friday, December 4, 2009

enough already

Insurance called today to inform me that they don't intend to pay me a cent for my kitchen.

Yes, the insurance I've been paying for X amount of time is not going to play.

That was until a friend in TV made a suggestion, writing to the local station about it, I also have a lawyer waiting in the wings (I am not remotely litigious, but I had a feeling they would try this shite).

Responding to the adjuster in the email she sent my refusal in, I told her I had contacted the media and my lawyer and she would hear from someone in the near future. Oh and what was her direct supervisor's name and phone?

Amazingly I get an email back from the adjuster saying she needs to speak to her supervisor and the estimator and would get back to me. Yeah. I thought so.

My insurance broker thinks they'll offer me a small amount as a gesture, and I think I'll be seeing the lawyer and he'll be saying we can get more, so I'll let him deal with that.

Bastards. You pay pay pay, and something happens, they look for anything to get out of paying. The lawyer says that unless they have a clause in terms of the age of my kitchen, previous damage etc (they looked at my kitchen a few years ago before insuring it when they inspected the entire house) or a clause stating they won't pay for plumbing causing flooding, they have to pay.

Sigh. Cuz I need this right?

I am NOT litigious like I say, but I'm also not taking this laying down considering I pay those bastards almost $70 a month for my house insurance.

And she thought I was kidding. Silly adjuster.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

yes, there's life over here

I know I know I am a blogging zero. I can't help it. It's partially desire to not bother because I'm only coming up with negativity at the moment, partially having too much on my plate and this is yet another thing to add to it, and partially everything going through my brain confusing me completely and being unable to really put it to paper, as they say (because this isn't paper).

So many good things, and yet so many bad things going on right now. Let's start with the good.


- back to photography with a vengeance!!! Lots of great bands out there and I get to see them and enjoy them while I take photos which is a passion. Happy happy!

- work is busy. This actually goes in both categories, but tis a good thing because it's a good indication of what is happening with the economy. Yey.

- good friends who put up with me and have been helping with my kitchen issues.

- my babies...although they keep dying off on me (the likkle ones - 2 hamster deaths in 2 weeks), they are what keep me going day to day

- 3 weeks til London....WOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!


- insurance company kitchen crap. I need to call my witch adjustor today...JOY OH FRIGGING BLISS. Haven't heard a word in over a week. Way to try to make me go away after all the $$ they've gotten out of me

- worried I won't have enough $$ for England

- family. Sigh. Can't solve that one anytime soon, can I?

- my laptop, the hard drive is considering dying on me. Silver lining to that one is that the replacement is cheap, and according to my IT department here at work, it's easy peasy to replace, as in I can do it myself (but the guy told me to bring it to work and he would oversee it for me). Backed up everything on my drive (250g thanks - photos take a lot of space), and I'm ready for the sudden death (which my luck will be when I'm in England! LOL)

- sheer exhaustion. I'm not SPCAing until I'm back from London, so that'll help in the long run, but right now I haven't had time to color my hair, it's that busy.

It'll all work out in the long run, always does, and I have faith that it will, but man o man, someone out there is testing me for sure (I don't believe in God, so it ain't him!)

Great week all...I'll post again when I can put together a non-negative coherent sentence!